Matter of Fact-Ness

Having finished Tom Moates’ book last week, when I took Harley to the arena yesterday (after having an AWESOME ride on him on Monday out on the trail), I decided to be “matter of fact” like Tom describes (well...that was my intention, anyhow).

I got in the truck with my husband and explained the concept a bit to him and that I was going to be “matter of fact” with Harley today. He was along to try to video me as the video from August showed me a lot of things that I hope have changed (about my riding).

I decided that I was going to be matter of fact with Harley and we were going to get down to business PERIOD. :-/

There was a lot going on at the arena, true, but I think I took my intention to be “matter of fact” and totally butchered the idea. We didn’t get to use the round pen...it was locked tight.

So, in the arena, I asked Harley out on the line and instead of calmly taking his thought out and following it, he jumped sideways like he thought I was going to blast him or something! My goal was smooth transitions on the line...his thought carrying him upward calmly and back down calmly, breathing, head down...a lot to ask for I think. Especially given the way we started! As we got started (after that initial reaction), we could go from the walk to the trot ok, but when I asked for the canter, it was met with bucking, rearing, striking, kicking out. Not just initially like in a “woo hoo! I feel great!” sort of way, either. I don’t know if I was still transmitting my “matter of fact-ness” in splattered, scattered energy or what...but every single request for a canter was met with that at some level.

I had to change my goals considerably. Eventually, after an initial humpy bumpy backy thingie on the line when asked for a canter, he could offer me a softer canter on the line, but if I dared to breath “good boy,” he planted his rear feet in the ground and stopped on a dime and whipped around to face me. Then he thought he was in trouble when I told him to get back out on the circle...that I would ask for him to stop...gosh...This was the first time I recall having so much excitement from him on the line when I didn’t do a bunch of emotional stuff. I felt pretty calm about it all. Which surprises me. I didn’t get angry or scared...this is good. I knew what I wanted and was sure of what it would look like when I got it.

I did ride him...walked, trotted, and cantered. NONE of it was pretty. :-/ I realize that Harley may have had a physical thing going on to add to this...but I think there is more to it than that. I hope to sort it out today by another trip to the arena.

I guess I have a lot of work to do before I “get” the matter of fact-ness described by Tom.

As we were getting ready to load back into the trailer for home, Harley let me know that he wasn’t particularly motivated to get in the trailer. I told him out loud (my husband witnessed this) that I hadn’t been angry at him at all today...that I didn’t feel anger, but now if he gave me guff about the trailer, I just might end up angry and that would be no way to end this session...(truth was, I was very disappointed...very sad...and anger *was* a secondary emotion very close to the surface by this time). In the midst of my explanation to Harley about how he needed not to “make mom angry” he slapped my face with one of those stupid kisses I taught him a few years ago. In spite of how inappropriate this may be to a knowledgeable horse person, the timing of it sure made my husband and I crack up...

Tell me horses don’t have personality! HA!